Yes, the Answer is Always Yes

The Gift

Be still, my soul, and steadfast.

Earth and heaven both are still watching

though time is draining from the clock

and your walk, that was confident and quick,

has become slow.

So, be slow if you must, but let 

the heart still play its true part

Love still as once you loved, deeply

and without patience. Let God and the world

know you are grateful.

That the gift has been given.

~ Mary Oliver, from Felicity

Great Serpent Mound, Ohio Adventure

1-11-21  -  The Anniversary

Forty years. Well, it's really forty-one if you don't insist on counting from the exchange of rings. 

I lost mine* and now I have lost his, but ultimately I was right** - rings were not required.

They said it would not last. But it did (does).

February 28 - The Miracle of the Rings

I ran out of steam that anniversary day. There must have been a "gotta" list*** or many calls. Whatever. 

Yes, I lost his ring and the replacement I purchased. [You see, you have to be able to be able to remove your ring in order to get an MRI. There was a bit of drama before we could get the original off.] But I didn't like seeing him without a ring and purchased a larger "temporary replacement." I wore his ring. Then I wore the replacement. Then they disappeared from my hand.

I was upset as I looked in the bed and on counters. The weather had gotten cold and my rings were all loose. "Maybe it happened when I was moving things in the freezer," I thought. Nope.

About 10 days after I had talked to myself ("It's just a thing") and had almost forgotten I was out in the wild garden. Our cold weather had come with clouds and this was the first sunny day. I decided to spread some leaf mulch and was about to start when something gleamed in the sunshine. 

There it was. I put it on my finger and knew which ring it was and then looked around to see if the "replacement" was there too. Nope.

I retuned to the garden after one call (and during a second - I do a lot of mindless one-handed gardening while talking on the phone). As I described finding the ring to a friend I saw another reflection from the garden. Yes...the other ring.

Mid-February, 2021 - The Gift of Gear

Dude loved gear. If I need anything that would fit in the category it is likely I will find it. But more interestingly is the way some is delivered. 

During the Great Texas Snowstorm I had reason to try out a few different jackets (I have always borrowed his clothes - it started before we were married when camouflage was "in style" in the late-70s and early 80s for about a nanosecond). I have warm clothing, but nothing like his. When the power went down (for 5 days) and especially when I had to leave the house, I tried out a number of warm jackets/parkas. Three times as I reached in the pockets I found a pair of gloves and a flashlight. Sometimes I found a pocketknife and/or dog bag (or two). 

It's an extension of behavior I recognized. Any time anyone needed gear, he would disappear into his gear room**** and come out with an arm-load of stuff. Then methodically he would go through the items with the "borrower". Was it the right thing? Did it fit well? Did you need two?

As I plan future trips (God willing and the world opens up again) I tell my co-adventurers things like, "trekking poles? Don't worry about trekking poles. I'm fairly certain I have some for you."*****

OC was here after the storm and I was sharing these stories (and offering her a set of trekking poles) when she said, "I can really use one of those headlamp flashlights." She went home with two. 

Don't worry, I have more.******

Other Thoughts?

Have no regrets. 

~Leave nothing unsaid. 

~Be grateful. 

~Accept the gift.

~Love never dies.

NOTES:

* I had taken it and 4 other bands (one for each child and one for our 10th anniversary - plain gold bands) and threaded them on placed my watchband. Then I put the watch in a pocket. We were preparing for a hurricane at 1020 and I took them off for safety as we were working "full out." [And I had seen someone almost cut their finger off when they snagged their ring while working.] The whole shebang disappeared.  He didn't talk to me for a week. It was his mother's wedding band. I finally said, "I'm heartbroken. There is nothing I can do now. I'm not going anywhere."

**I did not want a ring. I saw no need to marry. He talked me into it. "Maybe it is not necessary, but I would never want anything to get in the way of my relationship with your parents. I think it matters to them." He was a clever boy.

***We always hated the "gotta" list. Sometimes we all just need a break from things you "gotta do."

****I hate the term "man cave."

*****We use them for Amphibian watch.

******I have found four more sets - so far.